Today began with a bang.Continue reading “Forward propulsion (baby steps)”
The week leading up to Christmas had me feeling low and borderline depressed. This is pretty standard for me this time of year, and was augmented by the prevailing lockdown. I tried to keep my head above water but failed. There is a metaphorical abyss in my life that has a life of its own. For one thing, it moves. It follows me around. 😬Continue reading “The metaphorical abyss”
Imagine a life, still and inert.
Does it exist? Continue reading “A tranquil life desired”
Here’s the (not so) short version of what consumes my life at the moment:
I slipped on the wet back porch, fell and landed in puppy poop this morning. He pooped on the deck, not on the grass. The deck is raised. We have to go down five steps to reach the lawn.
maniac puppy can do this, navigate the steps. He does this every day a million times. IT’S NOT THE END OF THE FRICKIN’ WORLD.
The same old, day-to-day rut is getting me down.
I miss my friends. Some more than others. (sorry not sorry)
I can’t write. I can’t think.
So today, maybe, instead of writing another draft post full of crappy words to add to the pile of other draft posts full of crappy words, I’m going to post this statement and focus on it.
force teach myself to believe it.
I waver back and forth between a house in the country (mainly his wish, and my daughter’s) and a small minimalist (aka empty and void of all nonessential clutter) place in/near the city with access to this, that and the other*.
What is the answer? Continue reading “Will nature calm disquietude and restlessness?”
Last night after dinner I went for a walk.
And by walk I mean the opposite of walking. I mean mostly standing around and talking to people. 😀
Disclaimer: I’m feeling sorry for myself. Don’t be rude or obnoxious in the comments, I’ll block you. None of my self-absorbedness in this post means I’m not anxious or active in other, more important things going on in my family, community and beyond. This post isn’t a tally of what I do for others; I don’t feel like justifying myself to anyone today. This is my blog and today, this is what flows out of my head and into my keyboard. Sorry not sorry.
Some days I feel like I’m living inside a bubble.
I don’t mean to imply the bubble is an isolated, lonely entity of solitude, because there isn’t much of that despite still staying home most of the time. I just mean the lack of external obligations has me more isolated than usual, and for longer than usual. Continue reading “Living in a bubble”
A really bad mood has overcome me today, just out of the blue. In the later part of the afternoon. Continue reading “Mood”