I’ve been feeling a bit stuck (and very busy). All my balls in the air are causing me involuntary paralysis, so I procrastinate. Is it fear? Is it something else?
My tarot cards were sending vibes toward me, so I shuffled and pulled some. Here’s what happened:
The Empress upright
The Empress is number III in the Major Arcana and represents our feminine side: the nurturing, elegance, sensuality, creative expression and abundance. (Everyone has a feminine side, not just women). This card may have appeared to remind me that I have these qualities within me, and not to bury them.
It’s a timely reminder that I have a few sensually erotic short stories written and ready for publication, but have held back in doing so. I like the way I feel when I write these stories; it feeds directly into my own desires to feel feminine, elegant, creative and sensual.
Perhaps it’s time to bite the bullet and hit publish on some of those stories… stay tuned.
Three of Wands reverse
This card might be the one that shed some insights into why I am feeling stuck (or at least acknowledging it in tangible terms). When I saw it appear in the reverse position, I immediately felt like I had an AHA-moment.
See how the three wands (fire energy) are firmly planted in the ground? Those are my ongoing projects. Not only were they planted and activity was underway, there was growth, potential and forward movement. I can see this because of the sprouts on the wands.
But look closely at this card: the person who planted and actioned the wands is looking away from them. He’s not busy nurturing the sprouts, he’s looking off into the distance.
That would be me. Hah.
BUT WAIT! if you look even more closely you see three ships sailing past in the distance. They symbolize movement and forward propulsion. There is land in the distance indicating he is aware there are new and exciting opportunities ahead. Sure he’s currently ignoring his wands (projects) but he is touching one of them, meaning he hasn’t abandoned all hope.
Maybe he just needs a breather. Does he need a fresh approach or a change in direction on his current projects?
This Major Arcana card’s key words, when in reverse, are: self-doubt, inner critic, fear of judgement or criticism, hiding in one’s comfort zones/playing it safe.
If you look at the card you see the naked people have all arrived in front of Archangel Gabriel who has summoned them by playing his trumpet. They are here to be judged. There are Christian implications here I don’t understand, maybe you can educate me in the comments below. Point is, there is judgement coming from a higher calling for the vulnerable mortals (displayed by their nudity).
The judgement cards is calling on us to discover a deeper understanding of events in our lives which we may arrive at through quiet meditation or contemplation. Perhaps we are keeping some things from people in our circle for fear of being judged. I can certainly appreciate this sentiment, having gone through a few such moments during my “awakening” two years of If Not Now, When period.
There is also a need to be aware of the loud noises in your head. That’s your inner critic yelling at you. 😛
Awareness is the first step in overcoming self-doubt, fear and negativity. Discipline and focus will help break the cycle of this self-criticism, and allow a return to the path toward bigger and better things.
The cards and my personal situation
My writing and jewelry projects are in a somewhat slowed-down period even though this is the time with the upcoming holidays to focus on sales. There is an invisible force holding me back from pushing forward (both the Three of Wands in reverse and the Judgement card in reverse are indicative of this.)
Could be all the holiday distractions, the kids’ activities, or simply the somewhat melancholy atmosphere that typically surrounds me when I feel myself exposed and surrounded by all the commercialization this time of year.
What I need is to turn back around and look at my wands, and keep momentum. Focus on the happy parts (I love designing jewelry, I love writing) and set aside a specific time to tackle the less desirable parts (admin, sales, marketing, spreadsheet upkeep).
If you enjoy my tarot card journey, you can visit this page for more articles on my interpretations. Thank you for reading along, and see you in the comments.