Thanks for reading my erotica, now go get an STD test ๐Ÿ˜ณ

Back in the day when I was actively writing and publishing erotica on my other blog, I received many emails from various organizations who offered me something. Either it was an affiliate program, a gift of some sort requiring a review, or an opportunity to buy into their SEO packages in order to help me rank better on Google.

I read them all, and ignored 99% of them.

Every once in a while, I would take up conversations with the more eloquently written invitations. These few and rare people presented their case professionally, usually to join in a partnership or accept a free gift (as long as I write a genuine review on my blog). To date, I had not confirmed anything with anyone. I mean, yeah the free gifts “of my choice, just browse our website” was compelling, but there was that matter of non-existant privacy at my place to actually try the product and then write the review about it… ๐Ÿ˜‰

Point is, I still receive regular invites for business opportunities through that, mostly silent, blog.

Two days ago, I received an email of a different kind, one I had never seen before. Instead of free sex toys or similar props, I was invited to join something quite different.

Hi there, this is xxx from XXX.

[Our clinic] is an affordable online marketplace where customers can easily and securely order STD lab testing.

We sincerely expect to cooperate with you on our affiliate program and create interest together. We offer you $X on each sale you refer.

In addition, we will provide the best marketing support to reduce your workload and save your precious time and effort.

I’m confused. Are you confused? I’m definitely confused.

I’m confused about the prrceived link between erotic stories and sexually transmitted diseases.

Is it a foregone conclusion that anyone who reads smutty stories is riddled with STDs?

Is the assumption that as an erotica writer, I expose my content to people who are riddled with STDs?

Do they want me to tell my readers that hey, I appreciate you reading my arousing stories, here’s an invitation to get yourself tested for Gonorrhea and Syphilis because clearly, if you’re interested in reading sex, you must be having sex! And not only are you having sex, you’re having irresponsible, unprotected sex and are therefore suffering from Chlamydia, HPV and Herpes (or whatever other diseases).

In contrast, I’m also wondering if they might be on to something… Still, the entire thing makes me feel weird.

Also, the wording is a bit… off. Perhaps this is a person whose first language is not English, but that sentence where she says she “sincerely expects” to cooperate with me is kind of strange.

Plus, how is she going to save my ‘precious’ time and effort with marketing? Does she mean she will hurl my stories out on their social media to gain exposure as long as I include an invitation for people to click the link and book an STD test with one of their clinics?

Perhaps this is a stroke of genius and I’m just not ‘getting it’.

Frankly, I don’t know what to make of it.

What do you think?


12 thoughts on “Thanks for reading my erotica, now go get an STD test ๐Ÿ˜ณ

  1. The wording says scam! I mean sure, it could be legit and in China, but STD testing is widely available, free… even is US, sooooo๐Ÿคท๐Ÿผโ€โ™€๏ธ

    Get the toys instead๐Ÿ˜‰ If you can pee in the back of your car… imagine product testing๐Ÿ˜ฒ Live dangerously๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. With the really low-quality kinds of emails like that, I don’t think the people sending them are taking any time to actually look at the websites. I think they’re just searching for terms on Google and then harassing anyone they find with their dodgy email templates. And I just Googled that line about sincerely expecting, and it comes from a template on this site: chrunos dot com slash affiliate-recruiting-email

    Like

    1. I’m just not sure if I want the responsibility of sending a stranger to get a medical test so I can make some money via this website…

      I mean, no, I don’t want to do this.

      But yeah, I get it. The swag can be nice. There was one place in Japan who offered me any toy on their website as long as I wrote an extensive review and plastered it all over their sites. The timing was all wrong but that was a pretty cool offer.

      Like

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