I woke up an hour later than usual this morning and I felt it simmering deep in my core.
*It* being an unidentifiable something. The onset of depression? Some other emotional upheaval?
Maybe it’s the change in weather. Or the doom and gloom on the news I sometimes watch when I join my mom in the tv room.
(Note to self: stay out of the tv room.)
Perhaps it’s the never-endingness of covid and all its restrictions and limitations that’s making me feel down and blue.
I realized early this morning that normal socializing is not going to be a part of our lives for the foreseeable future. Just the other day a local blogger told me there were armed guards patrolling the entrance of a mall in downtown Toronto, checking for vaccine papers.
Aren’t we taking things a little far here?
With the darker, cooler weather looming I’m wondering how people are going to navigate the winter season. Even my niece, who just started her first year University, decided to visit her grandma rather than stay on campus for homecoming last weekend. She said there was police and security everywhere and it didn’t look like fun.
I’m not going to turn this post into a pro or con vaccine bitchfest. I’m simply addressing the mental health aspect of all of these issues, how they’re impacting the emotional wellbeing of this province’s inhabitants.
I know it’s going to get worse. Two western provinces are struggling with an influx of critically ill covid patients… Ontario has a much larger population and if I consider the impacts on all the non-covid-related illnesses that get pushed back because of covid, and how this will impact the skewed statistics the media will almost definitely spin negatively, I feel like the hermit lifestyle I’m currently living is maybe not the end of the world after all.
Having said that, I’m craving something that can’t be. Anything that is different, out of the ordinary, beyond routine.
There’s a part of me that wants to just walk into a pub or an eatery, randomly without preparation or reservations, just because, and sip a beverage or snack on some apps.
Can’t do it.
The funny thing is, I haven’t done much of that before recent events either. The impromptu drop-ins. Mainly because said beverages and apps were consumed rink side during or after youth sports activities…
But that was then.
Anyway. Enough of this negativity.
Today is a new day, and, for the first time since my mom returned from her trip (injured with a broken leg) we are going to venture out to Fortinos, a grocery store with a pharmacy in the back. She needs a refill of some prescription, and we need food.
We will take her Ferrari (walker) and see how it goes. 😀
I was much happier yesterday than I am today, as you can see in these lark-filtered selfies in which I pose my new earrings from my sidehustle. 😊
Maybe if I try hard enough I can get my mood turned around.