Tarot Supplement – Irritated about The Lovers card

Disclaimer: I am not religious, and my observations and interpretations of this somewhat religious tarot card may sound a little crass to those of you who follow a deeply Christian worldview. Comments are welcome but will be blocked if they attack or otherwise offend me or my readers.


The Lovers card in upright position in the classic tarot deck irritates me. At least at first glance.

The Lovers – Major Arcana Tarot card

Description of The Lovers card

Adam and Eve are standing in the Garden of Eden, naked and vulnerable. The impression I get is that the woman is looking toward the angel (and god) and appears less concerned by matters of the flesh, whereas the man is looking for passion, pleasure and release.

Why can’t the woman want to feel passion, pleasure and release? πŸ˜‰

Here’s the symbolic (Christian) interpretation of The Lovers tarot card:

  • The couple is naked which symbolizes their most vulnerable state.
  • They are in the Garden of Eden with the fruit and serpent symbolizing temptation.
  • Temptation is bad, because it leads to sex, which is bad if it takes focus away from the divine.
  • The woman looks at the heavens, symbolizing her desire to be with the divine.
  • The man looks at the woman’s nude body. We know what he wants.
  • The somewhat phallic-shaped mountain symbolizes volcanic eruption is imminent. We know another eruption is imminent. His, not hers. According to the card, the lady wants to feel divine pleasure, not an orgasm.

I was dissatisfied with this initial impression so I turned to my sources which include three websites, a few online tarot readers on YouTube and a couple of books. The ones I like place a contemporary spin on this card. I appreciate that.

However, as you may know from this post, I pulled The Lovers card in reverse, so in the interest of keeping this post a manageable length, I won’t dig too deep into the upright meaning of the card. You can do your own research if you’re interested. Biddy Tarot, Little Red Tarot and Labyrinthos have interesting interpretations which align with my own world view.

The Lovers in reverse

Main points when this card shows up in your reading in the reverse position are:

  • disharmony
  • imbalance
  • misalignment of values
  • conflict
  • detachment
  • making bad choices
  • indecision
  • struggle with self-love

My interpretation of The Lovers in reverse

Coupled relationships

The relationships that guide, fulfill and occupy us are diverse and varied. This is key in understanding the message about this card; despite the card’s name implying lusts and desire between two people, the meaning trespasses beyond romantic or sexual love.

The card asks us to acknowledge the current relationships that may exhibit some of the key terms when appearing upside down: in the case of spousal partners, are your current circumstances of disharmony a passing phase, or is this a case of having grown apart?

Look deeply into your circumstances; if misery and arguments make up the bulk of your relationship, has the inevitable occurred? Perhaps it’s time to honour yourself and consider letting it go.

If it’s a phase, understand that it takes two to tango, so to speak. There are ways to repair disharmony. The Lovers card guides you to seek help and find ways to increase communications with your loved ones.

But if the phase has gone on long enough, perhaps it’s time to take more drastic actions. Only you can make that decision – the card does not tell you one way or the other what course of action to take, but asks you to dig deep and search for the answer which exists within you.

Relationship with self

The Lovers card can also point to the relationship you have with yourself.

When it shows up in reverse, take a look at how you treat yourself.

  • Are you overly critical with yourself? (I’m not good enough, I will fail so I may as well not start, etc)
  • Do you suffer from inner conflicts? (I feel unattractive, no one likes me, etc)

Sometimes disharmony is part of life but can be overcome, especially when you take time away and nurture yourself, emotionally, mentally and physically. It’s part of the journey of life, to regain a balance of your inner self.

Other times, the card may point to a tough choice you’re facing, one that may have significant consequences.

The Lovers card shows up in a reading at a time when you need guidance and a reminder that you must choose a path that is in alignment with your world view and your values.


I think I can live with this interpretation. Those of you who have read here long enough know that I struggle with family issues (who doesn’t) and that the teenage trenches sometimes throw me into the pit of despair. But, I am spoiled in many ways, fortunate to have access to escapes for short periods of time where I can disconnect from the chaos, regroup and focus on myself.

I wish the same for you, wherever in the world you are.

Do you enjoy my tarot journey? I have written many articles about my discoveries on my tarot page, and welcome you to check them out at your leisure. If you’d like to make a donation to help support my craft, the links are at the bottom of this page.

Thank you for reading, and, as always, see you in the comments!

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8 thoughts on “Tarot Supplement – Irritated about The Lovers card

  1. Hi Writer of Words
    I appreciate this blog post. I guess I’m what you could “categorize” as faith filled & a believer in Christ…
    What I have learned over the last 5 yrs ended up turning my “Christian world view” upside down.
    Modern day Christianity has turned the church into a “business model” and the ancient art of Tarot – which is among Spiritual gifts I would attribute to mystical discernment and the energetics of femininity – into something it need not be.
    Thank you for bringing up and analyzing the Lovers card – it gave me a chance to notice things within the art work I had not seen in other material I have reviewed
    Blessed Be & Namaste –

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for this comment, I appreciate your perspective!

      I grew up without religion although my dad was raised Catholic and my mom Protestant. I have knowledge about the practices, rituals and passages in Scripture and find it intriguing from a historical or academic perspective, especially when it comes to artistic creations.

      I enjoy the intuitive, spiritual journey the tarot is providing me. Thank you for following along. ❀️


  2. After reading your posts in this series my reaction is that tarot is much like a self-help book in condensed form. Common life situations are addressed by each card and with the multiple interpretations one can sort of pick and choose what applies as well as possibly how to use the cards for guidance? Is that correct. In a simplified way, therapy in a box! I suppose if they cause a person to look deeper into themselves and their issues that’s a good thing, but I think many will only see the rather hyped, mystical portrayal that seems to be associated with tarot…magic and perhaps even evil if your religious inclinations lean in that direction.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’re not wrong. Can I say this?

      I have found the cards and their symbolic messages of life’s journey helpful in terms of calming me when I’m upset (which is often, as I’m sure you gather) and learn how to tune into my intuition. It has helped me in ways that I’m not sure expensive therapy would. I know therapy can work but to find the right person to connect with is time consuming and then, to get to the root of the problem simply by talking to someone one hour per week… I don’t have the time or patience (or finances) to deal with this.

      The cards impress me. Who thought of all these intricate details? And how accurately are they described? And how cleverly do they convey the life journey messages? Plus the symbolism is fascinating too. I studied art for five years and I enjoy the artistic representations of the symbols in the cards.

      I listen to some of the more popular tarot readers on youtube who mostly address relationship drama to an audience that looks to be of the millennial demographic. You can tell by the live chat in how they talk (they all talk the same). Having listened to them over the past few months and seeing how effective these tarot readers are in not only attracting regular viewership (huge audiences), but also making a TON of money at it (via voluntary donations), it makes me wonder just how much of it is simply smart marketing.

      But I bring myself back to the origins of tarot. I did a bit of historical research. It remains interesting enough to me to continue learning, and sharing here. Certainly it has not been in vain, for me anyway.

      But, yes, a lot of what you say resonates with me, too. (Sorry for my wordy answer… ) πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I think that you are one of those that are willing and also want to put in the work, rather it be using tarot , traditional therapy, religion of some type or something else. It’s funny you mention marketing and millenials. While I don’t think it’s appropriate to generalize to millenials specifically, I do believe that many people using any form of guidance just want quick answers. Those with some wisdom already understand that nothing is easy, and work is always part of the picture. I’m glad you’re finding this method helpful.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I’m enjoying it despite remaining slightly skeptical at some of the interpretations. πŸ™‚

        Thank you for your comments.

        Re generalizing the millennials, specifically on one youtuber, the literally all sound exactly the same, and there are MANY. It’s a little unsettling. (The guy has 472k subscribers and he does not do personal readings at all. He literally goes on youtube and tells whomever listens what he sees in the cards for each zodiac sign in terms of their love life and the audience gobbles it up. It’s… quite amazing, really.) πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

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