Redefining parental roles

There is/was a total lunar eclipse happening today, May 26, 2021.

I wonder if the magnetic energy is influencing the cause of all the recent upheaval I’ve succumbed to. Of course, succumbed is a subjective description of current events; some people who shall remain nameless will actually point blame right at me for having caused said upheaval.

I will neither agree nor disagree with their perspective. Safe to say that I accept, here in print and via text to the other parent in our family unit, responsibility for my most recent issues.

Perhaps it’s a situation of wanting empathy from them and not getting it; however, I seem to keep forgetting that I am the adult and that the teens, one in particular, are innocent (to a degree) and suffering worse than I did/do at the moment.

But I will not allow myself to be pushed out or pushed back into the predefined roles. I left on own accord, not because I’m leaving the kids, but because I’m gifting them a desired break from mothering.

I know I’m rambling – sorry. Suffice to say that my mothering in recent weeks and months is being rejected and given the nature of the children’s own state of mind while still in continuous lockdown (another two weeks minimum) it was simply best to grant them the peace of me not being in the tiny house.

I was going to leave for a visit to mom’s anyway, I just moved it up a day. Which coincided with the lunar eclipse.

So, back to the moon.

Is it the moon’s fault that I’m feeling discombobulated, spent and unhinged?

But no matter. I will take this day as the first day of the next chapter. I will not make rash decisions, I will not label this as ‘running away’ or ‘abandoning’ anyone, I will simply redefine my life as a parent to my teens under new terms.

Blogging about it is my way of holding myself accountable.

Incidentally, another blogger talked about family harmony today – seems I’m not the lone procreator/guardian/guide to the next generation who is feeling this way.

Sometimes, the internet it the only place where I feel understood.

17 thoughts on “Redefining parental roles

  1. As you know, there is often much DIS-harmony in my house. My daughter is 32 (how the hell is THAT possible?) and still we have clashes on a weekly, sometimes daily, basis

    Time away is a very healthy way to handle it. We aren’t meant to be in each other’s faces so much. Good for you for owning your part. As the saying goes, it takes two to tango… I hope others are owning their parts as well.

    I advise (not that you askedπŸ˜‰) much gazing out that window, and many chats with birds. They’re great listeners πŸ˜‰πŸ’ŒπŸ’Œ

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you sweet friend. ❀️❣️😍

      I actually had to head back to pick up the kids and take them to the dentist this afternoon. Even just one night apart changed the dynamic and they were more pleasant…

      I’m hanging with my younger one now (as she chats with her pals, so I’m chatting with mine πŸ™„) while I wait for the boys to return at which point I’ll head back to mom’s again. My son had a golf lesson so his dad joined. πŸ˜€

      But I’m looking forward to some respite.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I guess what I am saying is that once you lose your authority, it is hard to regain. He usurped my authority and had the class write their own rules and then left. The admin asked me if I wanted to stay on and I said “no” and there were no more monies as the budget was spent. I wish you well. I did get a good reference from Admin which is a win. Feeling unhinged, have a cup of coffee and stay away for awhile.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I understand. ALthough I don’t have children, I was teaching until mid Feb. an ESOL class. The teacher on record returned. I stayed at the school in another position as the admin liked me until that teacher returned. The ESOL teacher left after one month but not before he trashed my authority. Such is the life. I decided to share this with you on internet. Thanks for listening.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for reading and commenting. My teens aren’t exactly rejecting me in terms of authority, but given how restricted their lives have been due to covid and lockdowns, they are lashing out at me. I get it, concretely. Space away is good for all of us. It’s easier for me to leave because my work is mobile – my partner’s work is stationary and on a schedule as he teaches compressed college courses.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yeah, my work is mobile also as I kept my online gig! I get it. I do understand that to be in the public working during this time of covid and especially being a teacher means flexibility and sometimes a saint is needed. I have heard of parent’s issues with kids not doing online work and other challenges. I get it.

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