Look. I don’t like it but I do use it occasionally, this block editor Gutenberg thing. Only because they’re going to punish us more later, when they remove the other options indefinitely.
I blog in admin when I’m on my laptop, not block editor. This is what admin looks like.
My phone’s android. It still allows the classic editor although I know its days are numbered. So in my phone I practice blocks occasionally. Just because.
It is what it is. I am not exactly unhappy about this change, but it would be a stretch to call me happy.
* * *
The sun this morning during a frustrating walk with the pooch was a bright orange ball. Too bad I was so distracted by the puppy’s puppy behaviour to take proper pictures. Let’s see if they turned out…
The pictures don’t do it justice. The closest I could describe the sun’s appearance was like an orange. That’s how bright and colourful it was up there, hanging in the cool, crisp, fall sky. The camera won’t pick up the smooth line around the circle for some reason…
But the day before, this is what the beach photos looked like early in the morning:
So what does all this have to do with happiness?
Well, my focus, I guess. I’m on this journey of self-discovery. While I do this, stumbling around house-wife-ing and parenting, I try to sort out exactly how I feel.
Am I unhappy?
Am I happy?
It would be easy to blame the pandemic on my current state of mind. It definitely is partly to blame for all the challenges. Pre-covid, I was starting to develop interests outside of my mom/wife/home owner/cook/chauffeur roles. Now? I’m right back at it, as if my life was in reverse.
The puppy hasn’t made things easier, either. It’s like having a baby all over again…
Pre-lockdown, the kids emerged as more independent and self-sufficient, getting themselves to and from school, using transit, organizing their day without so much hands on, micromanaging supervision. It was wonderful!
I pursued my own activities, developed some new interests, left the house more often…
It’s just not as easy these days. And summer seemed short, mainly because of the ongoing lockdowns and the very gradual easing up of restrictions. There was no socializing, no festivals, no trips. Nothing. (Just like all of you experienced…)
Today, it takes much more focus to stay on track of my fluctuating, wavering happiness. Mostly, I feel just okay. Not bad, but not ecstatic.
Know what I mean?
I try to take the small joys and fixate on those, rather than allow myself to plunge into various degrees of depression.
So what are some of the small joys?
Well, as much work as the puppy is, there is a lot more outdoor activity. Given the weather is still relatively suitable for drama-free exiting the house (i.e. no jacket or only a light sweater as opposed to several layers) this has been a good thing.
Leaving the back door open to let the dog come and go more easily (and allowing sunshine and fresh air to come into the house) isn’t something we can practice much longer, so that’s been a good thing too. (Never mind the pesky wasps that find their way into the house…ugh.) I love fresh air and sunshine, natural light filtering into the house.
Another happy thing? Soup. I love soups! I cook them and eat them every day when it’s not heat-wave-ish. Nourishing, filling, and healthy. What’s not to love!
And back to school for the minions…oh wait. 🙄
School has not even started yet. Can you believe it? My son’s supposed to start later this week with a hybrid setup (half day, every other day, then remote in the afternoon).
My daughter was supposed to start Thursday (in two days) which is now delayed until next Tuesday (a week from today). Reason given was that the 66,000 students (out of 247,000) who have applied for virtual learning (staying home) has now grown to 72,000. They are looking for more teachers.
I am not sure what to think about all this, and I’m not holding my breath that school will begin next week. I am hopeful that something will start, at some point soon, because my kids have been on pandemic vacation for 6 months and enough already.
But the other side of the coin is that I have a lot more help with the puppy at this crucial time of his early development, so I’ll take it.
So that’s my Tuesday ramble. What’s up in your corner of the world?