I have no words.
I have no will, either, to make them flow.
Are we still in a pandemic?
It’s all just so…heartbreaking. Overwhelming. Tiresome, that we are here, again.
There is no place to escape.
I hear sirens, non-stop, in the distance as I putter in my garden.
What are they for? What’s the emergency?
Did someone die? Is there another dangerous protest situation, getting out of hand? Another shooting?
There are so many shootings…
They told the children back when they still went to physical school buildings that they can call a kids helpline if they need someone to talk to.
There are options for adults, too. Social media bombards us with mental health messages all the time that there is help for anxiety.
Call us. Reach out. We are here for you.
Yet all of their websites indicate delays due to a heavy increase in demand for counseling and therapy.
I looked, just out of curiosity.
Do people wait? How long are they on hold?
America is burning while the world is under siege of a deleterious virus.
There is hardship and devastation, confusion and despair, and continuous conflicting messages from elected leaders who seem to be making everything worse.
Now, take a step back.
Look past the news and the images on your phone.
Turn off the clips, just for a moment, and look at the person next to you. Or the neighbour standing on his doorstep. Or the lady walking her dog past your house. Or the clerk behind the plexiglass ringing in your products at the drug store. Or the masked guy standing in line behind you clutching a bottle of gripe water and a package of wipes.
Do they have problems? Personal problems? Serious ones?
Maybe it’s a colicky baby refusing to sleep through the night.
Maybe it’s school aged children wrecking the cramped apartment when told no, they still can’t meet their friends at the playground.
Maybe their dad has covid-19 and is ventilated in hospital or their mom is stationed in a nursing home currently under temporary military intervention/assistance/participation.
Or maybe, someone close to them has died.
These people, what do they do to cope? How do they support others, or lend a hand, or focus on creating their own internal peace and balance when there is so much turmoil everywhere?
I have no answers. I can’t shut my brain off either.
Things are tense here, too.
All I have left is words. But these words here, the ones I said won’t flow, they haven’t done anything to solve any of the problems.
We are in crisis.
And I still have no answers.