Fear.

I live in constant, crippling fear of the what ifs. Do you know this about me?

Some people do.

Here’s the thing.

The comfort zone is a very safe place. But, nothing happens in it.

It’s like that children’s show Teletubbies. 🙂

I purposely chose the path of safety, ambiguity, obscurity. I believed, or hoped, it would protect me from judgement, criticism, and blame.

Did it do that? Not really. But I didn’t invite the judgement, criticism and blame because I didn’t DO anything. I may have been a part of something or was peripherally involved, but certainly I wasn’t the instigator.

The comfort zone is not a risky place to live in. It’s quiet, comfortable, and safe.

And boring.

Then one day I reached middle age and realized, if I don’t make it happen, it won’t happen.

So what did I do?

Well, I recoiled more, of course. 🙄

But then, something did happened. Some external factors influenced me and suddenly, I found myself choosing a different path at the fork in the road.

This path is much riskier. But, it also promises things that don’t exist in the comfort zone, like possibility, opportunity and creativity.

Although I am now on the path leading away from my comfort zone home, I have only just reached the threshold.

Earlier, I was stuck at the pool with my girl who was taking lessons in life-guarding. For 90 minutes I sat in the sweltering heat (what a nice change…) and made massive amounts of notes on this topic.

Side note: It’s exhausting to live inside my head. 🙃

You want to talk about fear and comfort zones?

Let’s make it a topic for next week. I’ll start by condensing my notes and composing something that’s at least partially logical to read. Hopefully.

Maybe we can help each other, as I suspect I am not the only one who prefers the easy way out.

Welcome to the chaos that is inside my head.

Feel free to contribute your thoughts.