Getting worked up vs staying calm

Is getting all worked up a female trait? A mom trait? Or just a trait that some lucky people possess?

I have been told by some people that I get worked up.

🙄

I don’t deny this. But, I get the impression by the way they say this to me that it’s a characteristic they don’t necessarily approve of.

My question is this: has it occurred to them that maybe I have a reason to get worked up?

Or, that it’s possibly their fault for causing me to get all worked up? (They do have a knack for this talent on occasion…)

Blaming it on hormones is too easy. Saying this out loud will result in something getting thrown at their heads. 🙃

But seriously, this worked-up thing is getting me all worked up.

Case in point:

The other day we were having a chat about a sport situation. We’re in crossover season, where one sport is winding down and another is starting up.

If you’re a parent with kids in sports (or have been at one time) then you know that this is a family affair. Everyone in the household is impacted by the kid’s sport during the entire season, including pre- and post-season.

If there’s more than one kid, you may as well hire a secretary to keep you on track, because it can get quite complicated.

It gets very busy, is what I’m saying.

Here’s the thing:

No time is more stressful than try-out season.

There are many pieces to this try-out puzzle that have to fit just so, and sometimes, waiting around for decisions which you have no control over is challenging.

Then, as information starts to trickle in about so and so, and the grapevine becomes noisier, some people find themselves getting all worked up.

I’m not saying that this happens to me every time, I’m just saying I recognize the sentiment.

(I can see you rolling your eyes, stop it!) 😶

Anyway, my point is this:

Even if we know instinctively that getting worked up over a situation we have no control over is unhelpful, sometimes this exact reaction feels helpful (to me). It’s like letting steam out before perpetual explosion.

But, those who are worked up must keep in mind how it affects others, particularly if others are minors. You know, our prodigies. Our little superheros. They do not necessarily benefit by hyper, worked-up-like behaviour.

So, while some people can remain calm during stressful situations, others allow their brains to gear into overdrive. Interesting people like me, for example, might get a little worked up. 😁

So, when if this happens to me, I do this:

I clean something.

The other day, while letting an irritable situation work over in my brain, I swept the entire main floor of my house. Then I washed the seat pillows from the dining room, and cleared off all the kitchen counters.

I was fueled by the activity in my brain while waiting for answers that did not arrive.

Then came the epiphany: the outcome of getting worked up is a clean house.

Did you know this? 😊

Getting worked up has it’s benefits after all.

19 thoughts on “Getting worked up vs staying calm

  1. I really enjoyed this post. “Getting worked up” is such a curious phrase, isn’t it? It’s passive as if someone else is working you up. I think of someone kneading us like dough or whisking us into a froth. You are so clever, using (house)work as an antidote and giving the phrase a new meaning.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh my gawd, this is so funny because it’s right on time with something that happened to me this morning. Sunshine, Rude Ass, & Mr B were all in my living room, and I said that something “pisses me off”. They all three started making their snarky peanut gallery comments, which made me want to throw things. I drank more coffee instead.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hormones are not joke. 😛

      Seriously, I understand why someone might make the comment. I’m not even disagreeing. It’s tough juggling all this hormonal crap. But at the same time…it it worth it to get her worked up even more by saying such a thing?

      Liked by 1 person

  3. If someone tells me another person is “getting worked up” about something, I would ask them to clarify if they mean the person gets upset/angry or if that person is just passionate about what they’re talking about. If someone thinks I’m getting “worked up” about child abuse and neglect, to that I say, “Yes I am!” and I’m proud about it. Then getting “worked up” is a good thing lol

    Like

    1. Good point! It’s a perspective thing…

      What I referred to in my article was the more superficial aspect…yes, it’s still passion I feel when I think about my kid or his sports endeavors, but it’s a different kind of passion than, say, when I watch a show about baby animal orphans due to illegal poaching.

      Either way, when I get worked up in either situation, most people around me will notice. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I think it’s genetics more than environment. I know people (ahem, me and extended family) who react very quickly in situations and others (husband) who are slower to react. I have worked my whole adult life at going against genetics and teaching myself how to stop and think before reacting. It’s hard. Gives me a headache some days. 😀 I can get worked up at the drop of a hat. I really have to work hard on it.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I think it may be more of a female than make trait but I think that’s because women juggle and care more. I know few women who don’t get worked up. I too found cleaning quite helpful when getting in a state. These days, I head off with the dog, have lots of imaginary conversations on the subject that’s bugging me and come back with more equilibrium (usually) and a bit fitter too, hopefully.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Getting worked up? Yes, I can relate. It happens less often now than it used to (I’m no longer in the day-to-day of raising children) but I think it has value. I don’t hold on to my anger. I let it out and it disappears. I’m not a grudge holder for 99% of the things that I get worked up over. My BF learned pretty early on in our living together that if I get angry to let me vent and then it’s over.
    Things not to do: tell me I’m overreacting, tell me to calm down, tell me what is making me upset doesn’t matter.
    And in your case, you’re channeling it into cleaning. That’s impressive.

    Liked by 2 people

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