On writing and maintaining internal propulsion to continue

I recently had an idea about writing. Not blogging, exactly, but writing the story inside your head that needs to be told. To be written out, word for word.

I’m in the process of writing a book; a memoir, of sorts. It is the story of me, told in the third person, in a child’s voice.

Why child’s voice?

Because I got very, very sick when I was 7. So sick that I almost died. And the thoughts, the internal voices that went on inside my head at the time, they are alive and well and seem to want to get out of my now adult brain.

At the time, I lived in a small city just outside of Zurich, Switzerland. My mom is Swiss, her family lives there, and I spent my formative years in her home town. Even though I was born in Canada, I spent ten years of my childhood in Switzerland, speaking the language, learning the customs, appreciating the cuisine (namely cheese and chocolate. Ha.)

I started writing my memoir several years ago and then stopped. If you have experience with writing, you know that this sometimes happens. Since no one is paying me and I have no deadline to speak of, I seem to have a very laissez-faire attitude toward this project of mine. I seem to be missing something: internal propulsion, maybe.

I did send my started, first draft, unfinished manuscript to a variety of friends and family to read a couple of years ago. I needed feedback, and some of what I received was phenomenally helpful.

But, as these things go, I lost my thread. My oompf. Life got busy, stuff happened, things distracted me, and the manuscript is sitting there wondering what’s up.

But the child’s voice, my voice,Β  keeps creeping into my brain.

So a year or two ago I started writing short stories that reflected partly about that time in my life, but might have happened to my sister instead of me. Or I embellished some things, just to practice the voice.

Then there was the time when I sent out a few of the stories for publication in newspapers or magazines, which got rejected by…I can’t remember whom now. I’d have to consult with my list in my spreadsheet which I buried somewhere in my email backup folder.

I have a list of articles and stories I submitted, half-heartedly, to various publishing venues. Most ignored me, some responded that ‘at this time we are not yada yada bla bla blah’…you know the drill.

It barely affected me.

This surprised me, because I don’t usually take rejection well. I usually take rejection personally (because I’m 22 and I don’t know any better….). πŸ˜›

(I’m not 22…, nor do I want to be 22 again.)


I then thought I could submit some of these stories, practicing the voice of my memoir, to a bunch of contests.

Nothing happened. Whatever. Contests schmontests.

Then, it hit me. Perhaps I should just take matters into my own hands. Eh?

What do you think, you writers out there?

If I write a bunch of stories in the same voice of the little girl in the memoir, and self-publish them on Amazon or Amazon Kindle or whatever, using CreateSpace or something of that nature, maybe I could get some feedback to help me get my oompf back and finish the story? Get my memoir written, finally?

I just don’t know what to do.

But at least I’m thinking about it again, after that long dry spell.




21 thoughts on “On writing and maintaining internal propulsion to continue

  1. Yes! Do it! I’m so pleased at my own little self-published book from last fall. It really felt amazing to have a completed project and to know that I could produce something. It’s not about making money (HA HA HA, do NOT do it for the money!), but it’s about having your stories in one place, knowing that they are “done,” and that you’ve preserved them for the future. It also gives you confidence to move on to something new.

    SO totally worth it. Let me know if you want the name of my editor.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Gah! I went to comment on your most recent right after it said “what are your thoughts” and theres no comment section available 😭😭😭

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Probably just defaulted. I take my comments down intermittently so the only reason i mentioned it is cause i was pretty sure you wanted comments on that one lololl

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Your writing experience is such a familiar story to me. I have had so many writing stop/starts and attempts with no success. Am building up to another effort and also thinking to have a go at self publishing. I think now, as I get older, it’s more important to just get the job done rather than worry about what people will think of my efforts. You blog, you write. I’m sure you can self publish as well.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m still stuck in the middle of the self publishing thing. Some people love it, others hate it. But keep polishing them up. Keep working on it. It’s in your head, so you must get it on the page. And research self publishing

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I am all about telling one’s story for the sake of simply telling it. I think self-publishing sounds like the way to go, simply because you aren’t beholden to what an editor would want from you and the story remains it’s personal integrity.

    I knew you had European relatives but don’t remember reading before that you grew up in Switzerland. That’s so cool! I’d love to read your memoir!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Im not a writer at all, i just like to talk to anyone that will listen and listen to anyone who wants to talk, so my advise has no experience or backing to it. I would say though that if theres an avenue for you to start giving it a go again then you should go for it! Whats the worst that can happen?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. There is an invisible fear that is holding me back…. don’t ask me why! Perhaps continuing will help me explore just that. ☺ Thanks you for your feedback.


  7. I have started this blog to get myself motivated to write a book. I haven`t started and it amazes me as I have just finished a degree and wrote soooooo much….so it must be the lack of deadline that is stopping me. I would be interested in this and have looked into it, and thought about doing it myself. At least in that way as you say you will get feedback and could start with short stories to see how it works, before the time it takes to finish the memoir. I have a friend who did this with a small cookbook she did and now has a very successful one πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Quick comment for you Claudette! I was just listening to a podcast and did you know that Fifty Shades of Grey was self published and was only available as ebook!! Then it just took off by chance. The world is our oyster πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

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